Month: February 2017

THE SIMPLE THINGS

13726840_1327381973943500_1666718128205229117_nIt’s been a while I have been in a daze

GLENNA'S GROOVE

THE SIMPLE THINGS

I usually only remember my dreams

when I take a nap and awaken suddenly

I’m glad that I don’t remember them usually

because they are so different yet the same

different faces and different places but

the situation is constant: BEING LOST

I can’t remember where I live

I can’t navigate my existence so

I resort to extremes

I don’t have a phone to call anyone

if I do have a phone the battery is dead

I can’t remember the way back

to anywhere so I wander like a nomad…

I don’t have a way to get from

point A to point B so I mix

with crazy people and circumstances

I am walking down the road

and it turns into a cliff that I can’t climb

I have a job but I don’t have anything

to wear or remember where to go

I have many fights with…

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THE SIMPLE THINGS

THE SIMPLE THINGS

I usually remember my dreams only

when I take a nap and awaken suddenly

I’m glad that I don’t remember them usually

because they are so different, yet the same

different faces and different places but

the situation is constant: BEING LOST

I can’t remember where I live

I can’t navigate my existence so

I resort to extremes

I don’t have a phone to call anyone

If I do I can’t remember the number to call

if I do have a phone the battery is dead

I can’t remember the way back

to anywhere so I wander like a nomad…

I don’t have a way to get from

point A to point B so I mix

with crazy people and circumstances

I am walking down the road

and it turns into a cliff I can’t climb

I have a job but I don’t have anything

to wear or remember where to go

I have many fights with associates

based on principles and loyalties

but I do not fight with

the MONSTERS

you would expect from

a person that sleeps with

a light on at all times

My problem is not

the Boogie Man or

the monster under my bed

but the “SIMPLE THINGS”…

that I cannot do

I cannot connect with self

and therefore society

Never feeling safe or whole

or having a destination

a foundation or a home…

My eyes are adjusting to the light and the darkness…

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As my eyesight blurs with age

but at the same time ironically

my inner vision has improved

a bittersweet /double-edged sword

I spent so long hiding in a semi-conscious state

trying to sleep my life away and hide from pain

the years past and so did my youth

There is a new pain that I have acquired

besides the typical aches and pains

It is the realization that (even in all its splendor)

this world is a scary place, not just my home

or my corner but a circus called civilization

I still fear the monster hiding under my bed

or is the monster actually inside of me?

Moral dilemmas play on my conscience

but there never seems to be an answer

Being afraid in the past I leaped

into a life of darkness in its finest form

I danced with the other monsters

the fear of climbing a ladder for

fear of falling can make us resort

to the extreme of jumping off the

roof of a building, as I mentioned

my sight is fading but my insight is 20/20

but do I really want to see?

Voice of reason

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Why am I still alive?

Its not like I was trying

at least not in the past

A woman once questioned me

with hostility asking why I

lived and her father died..

I am talking about AIDS

I did not have an answer for her

I was sarcastic, smug and cocky

trying to hide my fear and self loathing

No, I do not know why I lived and

your father died

although this was long ago

I never forgot you

or your father whom I never met

and many friends that I have

lost to AIDS over the years

I do not know why I lived

and her father died but

I plan to find out..

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